Part 2: Why baseball is actually the perfect sport or Why Kyle's post on football is dumb.

Part 2 of 2 (Here's part 1, and here's Kyle's original)- Why baseball is actually the perfect sport or Why Kyle's post on football is dumb.

6) Points (runs) actually mean something. Unlike the other major sports, baseball runs are actually worth something. In football you can easily score 34+ points in a game. In basketball 100 isn't unreasonable. With games that you can score so easily and in such large numbers, teams don't have to play the whole game. You can make up loads of ground in the second half or even last quarter. In baseball, every inning, and every out matters. Every player has to be prepared on every play to save the game.

7) The ball park is one place where you can spit and scratch your junk as often as you please. I was watching the ALCS this year when an on field camera frame (that had previously held a tight shot on the right fielder) was suddenly consumed by a players body from the waist down. Unbeknownst to the player, the camera continued to film him as he reached down and rearranged his furniture. He then waltzed off, never realizing what just went down. What other event lets this fly? None. It's part of baseball. Football is still recovering from JT & Janet's wardrobe malfunction. In baseball, dudes can be dudes.

8) There is more strategy involved in baseball than any other sport. Pinch hitters, finesse pitchers, closers, power pitchers, signal calling, place hitters, etc. The entire offense is dictated by the manager and players work together to achieve the goal. You can change so many facets of baseball: batting orders, five infielders, infield shift, outfield shift, intentional walks, defensive specialists, double switches, pinch hitters, double steals... it goes on and on. Professional baseball is a chess game that changes as the game progresses. It's not a finite number of plays in a playbook (like football), but a living game that uses interchangeable strategies to win depending on the current situation.

9) The better team wins. Time is not an issue. In football you have 4 quarters to complete the game. If you have a tie at the end of regulation, you have one of the worst tie break systems in pro sports (sudden death). In baseball, you have 9 innings to finish the game. If you are tied at the end of regulation, you play until one team bests the other. It's simple, elegant, and there is no controversy. It's not who has the ball last. The best team always wins.

10) Benches clear, batters charge the mound, pitchers go "head hunting." Hockey is just plain brutal, a football hit can end a player's careers. When there's emotion and violence in baseball, it's good old fashioned fist fights in a grass field. You can't get more manly then that.

11) It's the Great American Past Time. It just is. Get over it.

Look, you're talking to a football fan... I get it Kyle, football is exciting, hard hitting, and flashy. Football is the busty blonde that sits in the center of all the boys in class. She's hot, she's flirty, you love to hang her on your arm. Football's the sport you take out on a Friday night, hit it like a champ with in the back of your El Camino, and dump the next morning. Sure, she'll make you feel like a man for a few hours, but you'll always end up all empty & guilty when you drop her off.

But Baseball, Kyle... Baseball doesn't make you feel like a man, she straight up makes you a man. She's smart, reliable, consistent, and full of class. She's not just there to excite you on the weekend, she's there to spend time with every night of the week. She's the game you take home to meet your mom and out to hang with your friends. She's the game you court, marry, and teach your kids to love. She's deep, complex, powerful, and full of tradition and values.

That is why baseball is the perfect sport.


Melanie said...

well unless I missed something, that's only 10 reasons, not 11...seems #7 is missing

Dolphinsbarn said...

I guess I'll have to think of a seventh then. Don't worry, there are plenty of reasons. :)

Joe said...

Dolphinman, you burn with a passion from which I dare not turn away. Oh, Lords of Summer, why must we wait until April to come again to your diamond-shaped courts of delight?

Kyle said...

Fine, I took the bait and posted a brief rebuttal here: http://www.kylemonson.com/2008/11/called-out-by-baseball-fan.html.

One thing I didn't include there: Your "too many points" argument is the exact same as the "too many games" argument. There are so many baseball games in a season that none of them matter until September. A friend of mine said he watched almost every Mets game in 2008. If that's true, he spent roughly 23 FULL DAYS doing nothing but watching Mets games (and then they didn't even make the playoffs).