Idol Recap

So I decided that in Mel's absence I would give a brief recap of tonight's American Idol. I know it doesn't seem like something I would be into, but don't worry, I won't make it as effeminate as Adam makes all of his songs.

To begin, can Fox come up with any less relevant theme's than the last two weeks. Maybe tweens aren't tuning in so Fox is going after an older demographic. Also, does it strike anyone else as strange that the mentor was this guy:
Kris started it off tonight, and I don't know about you, but I was too lost in his eyes to even pay attention to whatever he was singing, I mean, he's a good looking guy, wait, I meant to say grrr football. The judges seemed to really like it except for Simon who said it "was wet." I don't know if he was talking about Kris's performance or Paula's seat. And talking about Paula, did she look like the people behind Lexus' Christmas commercials are dressing her now?

Allison went next and I thought she was, meh. She has never really done it for me and I didn't think that she had a great night. I did notice during her song that Chef, from South Park, got a job playing piano which is nice.

Matt, JT without personality, went next and I thought he failed miserably. It sounded like he spoke most of the words and sang every fifth word. I think he's a gonner.

Danny's performance was the best of the night, in my view. He started off a little slow and didn't seem to get into it until about half way through, and then he brought the thunder. The growl and soul was a nice change of pace for him compared to singing sappy ballads. I think that he or Kris are the ones to beat KD Lang in this contest.

Adam finished the night and you can tell the producers want him to win. He had a very dramatic entrance, but I thought he looked a lot like a lesbian Elvis impersonator in his white suit. Is it just me or does he take every classic song he sings and take a big dump on its grave? Maybe I still hold a grudge over the whole Johnny Cash thing, but does he really have to "Claudioize" every song.

Well, that's enough homophobia and homoerotica for one post. What do you think, does Adam really suck as bad as I think, is Kris super delicious, am I going to hell? If you want to read a real recap then check out Jeff's blog.


Grandma Smith said...

Great recap of the show last night. I'm a real Danny fan and hope that Kris makes it into the last three spot. But I'm pretty sure that Adam is going to take the show. Very talented but very very creepy.

Krista said...

Lol Mark. I had missed you!!! I totally disagree with you on most counts. I think Adam is a tall, gay, sexy drink of water, and having a crush on a gay man is a definite first for me. I also disagree with you about Kris. He is decent looking and all, but I just can't get the image of Garth from Wayne's World out of my head every time he sings out of just the corner of his mouth! It drives me INSANE!! I think Danny is okay and all, and he definitely has the pity card going for him with the loss of his wife this year, but Adam is a shoe-in. So get out your white platforms, rainbow flag, and your purple shirt (I know you at least have the shirt!) and get ready to celebrate yet another homo AI winner. (Hey- at least he is out of the closet this time!) And don't worry, I don't think having a homosexual crush on a talent show contestant is punishable by hell, so you just go right on loving him!

laurel said...

Dying of laughter over here. Thank you.

Nachelle said...

Oh Mark, I forget what it is like not to be around you, too funny and really "Claudioize"...thanks for the laugh